New Year, New Outlook

Well, I'm going to try. 2010 was incredibly stressful so for 2011 I've decided I'm really going to work on my stress levels. I've got a couple things in mind--exercise, yoga, and acupuncture. I cheated and started the acupuncture in 2010. I really enjoyed my first appointment and it was nice to have nothing to do for 45 minutes but relax. The yoga and exercise will be starting on Friday the 7th. We have a guest in town right now and our itty bitty apartment is just not conducive to extra guest + yoga/zen room. I picked up the 12 week fertility plan and am using the yoga exercises in the book to craft my program. If anyone has used it before or has any advice, please let me know.

I had my first RE appointment of the year today. The cyst, happily, is gone. I'm not waiting on AF and then back to the RE for the Cd3 ultrasound/meds. I also found out that insurance will cover IVF and PGD! Now I have to decide when and if I want to go through with this. Mr. F and I are thinking we'll do at least 2 more medicated IUIs before moving on. I really want to be in a better frame of mind and in better physical condition before we move to IVF. So, for now, I'm going to try to focus my energy on getting myself healthy and happy again.

I Need to Be More Assertive

Well, I know what injectibles I'm going to be on (Follitism). However, my doctor's appointment was annoying. I go to a practice with two doctors. I saw one on Saturday. Dr. A told me I need to produce more eggs and basically my last cycle was crap because I only had 1 egg and not so great lining 7.8. Dr. A suggested injectibles after Clomid to get more eggs and better lining. While I have terrific medical insurance, I have terrible prescription insurance. So, Dr. A offered to give me samples.

Today I come to the office and see Dr. B (who is my normal doctor). Dr. B apparently has no idea I'm starting injectibles and instead mentions estrogen patches to increase my lining. After discussion with Dr. B about what Dr. A had told me on Saturday, I end up getting my injectibles. However, she only wants to give me a small dose because we only want 1-2 good eggs! I'm not sure if my RE is like everyone else's but my head is spinning by the time I leave. I see the Dr. for about 5 minutes (4 of which is procedure) and I get so much information thrown at me that I don't ask the right questions. So, I leave the office and think about what Dr. B said. Then, I start to get mad. Why didn't the doctors communicate with each other? Why is my treatment not more aggressive--clearly my eggs are crap! So, I've made a solemn promise to myself that Thursday (next appt) will be different. I'm going to say what I'm thinking and ask her to be aggressive.

In other news, I went out for Halloween and actually had a great time. We met up with a lot of friends and relaxed a bit.

The Waiting Game

I've been patiently waiting. Well as patiently as I am able to wait. I finally got in to see the specialist this week that was supposed to tell us everything about our translocation (REs) words. Unfortunately he was unable to tell us anything we didn't already know. So after waiting a month to get into see him, I'm now being sent to someone else. I have more faith in this next appointment but to say I'm frustrated would be an understatement. All Mr F and I want to know is whether we are able to biologically conceive our own child. If so, then we have already decided we're willing to keep playing the odds game and will survive any losses that come our way. However, our RE has us on birth control because he wants to make sure natural is the best decision--the other would be IVF w/PGD ($20k price tag for those unfamiliar). So, here we sit in this purgatory. Wasting time and waiting for answers.

On the subject of wasting time, I am so sick of Drs telling me not to worry and that I'm young. Granted I'm in my early 30s. This is probably on the young side for those visiting REs. However, it is abundantly clear that it's not going to be an easy road for me to have a child. This BT complicates everything. Just having a child may take years and I'd like at least 2. So, don't on one hand tell me to try to have all my children by 35 and then on the other tell me how young I am. I don't really understand how that math works out.

I'm really just kind of in a bad mood right now. I just want some answers so Mr F and I can make a decision on how we want to proceed in building our family. Supposedly, we may get them next week. With the way things have been going, I'm not holding my breath.