Then there were 8....

But still no IUI and I am clearly now the problem patient. Sigh. I got the trigger shot and am to call back with my next af. I'll then do another baseline ultrasound to see if (or how many) cysts I have from this go round. I really wish this RE didn't have my money so I could break up with him.

Cancelled.

Sigh..Between 12-14 follicles ready to go (some over ready to go). My left side still isn't doing crap. So, the RE cancelled. He wants a better response. The IUI is a no go--because I have too many follicles. I argued, it got me nowhere. I'm going in for the hcg shot on Thursday to get rid of all of these. Then waiting for AF. Then back on the pill. Potential new retrieval at the end of August, though this may not work with my schedule. So, maybe September. Sad, disappointed and frustrated.

Our Plan

Thanks so much for all of your advice yesterday. It was greatly appreciated. A common theme seemed to be that we should just go with our gut and do what we think we can live with...so that's what we're going to do. Last night Mr. F and I decided that "we will" be converting this cycle to an IUI if necessary---unless there is some medical reason why we shouldn't proceed. Just "not wanting to get me pregnant" is not enough of a reason for us. Yes, I have crappy eggs....but I also went thru multiple IUI cycles at this same clinic before proceeding to ivf. Nothing has changed since then. Since a new ivf cycle wouldn't fit into our schedule until October it seems reasonable not to waste the eggs I've made and give it a shot. Plenty of ladies with BTs hit the genetic lottery and maybe I can be one of them. Of course, we also decided that we are going to nail them down on will or won't insurance cover this. Insurance has had no problem covering my IUI/injectible cycles before (they have no cap). So, I'm not sure why this time would be different. I think my RE just isn't very familiar with insurance and coverage--that is left to the business people. I'm feeling a bit better now. Of course, I'm hoping the above is moot and I'll get to my appointment on Monday and my left ovary will have decided to get in the game. For those that asked, yes my meds have been increased. I started at 175iu F.ollistim/75 M.enopur and I'm now at 300iu F.ollistim and 75iu M.enopur. Apparently those are some pretty hefty doses for someone my age and with my antral follicle count. Which then makes me wonder if maybe I was oversurpressed?

Cancel or Not? Need advice.

Really needing some advice from any ivf "in the know" folks. I had my first ultrasound today (I've done stims 4 days now) and we saw 9 follicles on the right (about 4 measurable and all under 12) and 7 on the left (only 2 measurable and both under 10). Apparently, this isn't a great response so I got the dreaded cancellation talk. My RE wouldn't tell me one way or another whether or not I should cancel. Apparently he believes I will get about 16 follicles at this point...he would prefer 18-20. They were so worried about me hyperstimming that they used too low of a starting dose---this is the only thing he would do differently the second go round. Obviously I'm ticked....and depressed. I've seen ladies with my antral follicle count get 25-30+ eggs on the interwebs so it's depressing that I'm looking at 16. If I had normal chromosomes, I'd be ecstatic...not so much with my crappy eggs.

I currently have $2500 of meds in possession (and have used a lot of them). The RE said if we cancelled insurance may cover them--but that was a very unlikely may. So, if we cancel I now have to pay them $2500 for meds plus $2000 for a new cycle and then get to start this crap all over again. I know for those of you that don't have insurance that this seems like very little to pay--but my dilemma this entire time has been donor eggs abroad vs. ivf with my own eggs. We decided to do ivf with my own eggs first because we could process so inexpensively. With the extra $2500 tacked in this cuts into our donor egg budget (back-up if this doesn't work). Our new cycle wouldn't start until October. As far as converting the current cycle to an IUI--the RE is against it. We don't want to get me pregnant with my crappy eggs. So, this would all be a waste of time, money, etc. Right now (since I'm already paying for the meds) we've decided to keep stimming until Monday and then go back and see if there is any progress. Beyond that, I'm just at loss for what to do...any advice would be greatly appreciated.

First E2 level

They told me it's on the low side (ahhh!). It's 284--off to furiously search google. I'm upping my f.ollistim dose to 300iu and Menopur is staying at 75iu this evening. Really hoping this doesn't mean the cycle is doomed.

Cd3..Starting Stims

Stims start for me this evening. I will be using F.ollistim 175iu and M.enopur 75iu. I've bumped my L.upron dosage down to 5iu. I'm also going to be starting an antibiotic tomorrow and d.examethasone. I'm going to be taking 5 different medications at once--which is a bit scary. I had a really quick baseline ultrasound today and they eyeballed about 17 follicles. I'm hoping that number will increase as stims increase. My next appointment is Thursday and I'll update you all again then. Below is a picture of the meds currently in my possession. I'll get more--including pio--when needed.

Almost There....

Stims start on Monday. I go in tomorrow for my first blood draw. Ivf is currently underway. I've been trying to do a bit of research into common stim dosages for ivf cycles. Mine seems really low to me. I'll be on 175iu F.ollistim and 75iu M.enopur for the first 4 days and then I'll have another blood test. It's really important that I get a lot of eggs so that hopefully at least one (please more than that) will get thru cgh and come back normal. I'm interested to see what the rest of you think about the dosage level and/or what dosages you were on.

In non ivf related news, my sister had her baby. I am an aunt again. I get to go home in a few months to visit and see the baby. It'll be hard but I'm happy for her and excited to be an aunt. Also, happy to say that my headaches have been getting better. Apparently my body is getting used to the L.upron. My legs, however, are not happy with the cluster of bruises that have sprung up on them. I must not be a very good shot giver!

Headaches and Hope

Wow....these headaches are horrible. I've suffered from them my whole life so I'm quite used to the intermittent weekly headache. These are different though and last all day every day. My RE office doesn't want me to take any other medication other than that which I'm currently on. So, I've been suffering. The only thing that seems to help is sleep--which I've also really been wanting to do a lot of. I think it's a combination of the medication and remnants of jet lag. My next RE appt is Wednesday. I'm hoping they will bend a bit and let me take something to help ease the head strain.

In more positive news, I just found out today that my co-worker and his wife are pregnant. Normally, I wouldn't be as excited about this news. However, they have worked long and hard for this baby. They went through years of fertility treatments and nothing worked. They had resigned themselves to the possibility that they would remain childless. They have been trying for 15 years and are both in their mid forties and have never seen a positive pregnancy test. She is now twelve weeks along. Stories like these give me hope and I'm thrilled for them.

First Shot Down

The shots have officially started. I gave myself my first dose of L.upron this morning. Yesterday we got our final calendar and went over consents, meds training, etc. It seems as if I'll be getting my meds as needed--which I am a bit sad about because I wanted to take a picture of all the loot. I also got verification that we will be doing a fresh 5 day transfer. We're doing the cgh testing on day three. So, far I have  no side effects from L.upron (but it's only been a few hours and I'm on my first dose). I've read horror stories on other ladies blogs but I'm really hoping that I'm one of the lucky ones that it doesn't affect much. I go for my next appointment next week--when I will have my baseline ultrasound and our cycle really be underway.

I'm Back..IVF/CGH Prep Underway

I'm back from my holiday and I had a wonderful time! I'm looking forward to relaxing for a few more days, catching up on sleep, and catching up on all of your blogs before returning to work.

Our first (and hopefully only) IVF cycle is currently underway. I'm on day 7 or so of bcp and have my first appt/prep for Lupron appointment on Thursday. Looking forward to it but also extremely nervous. Retrieval is currently scheduled for July 15th and it will be interesting to see if my body sticks to that schedule or not. I believe I start Lupron this weekend--I have to drag out my ivf calendar again. If anyone who has been through ivf has any words of wisdom, I'm all ears.

Award and IVF update

First, I've received a blog award from Hopeful1 at Our Twisty Tourney Journey! Thanks!

Here are the rules for being awarded The Versatile Blogger Award:
1. Thank and link to the person who nominated you.
2. Share seven random facts about yourself.
3. Pass the award along to 7 new-found blogging buddies. 
4. Contact the winners to congratulate them.

7 random facts.....

1. I'm scared of the dark. I can deal with it--but I don't like it. 

2. I was the lead singer in a band in college and I still love singing. 

3. I once had a pet rat. 

4. I have a younger sister and brother.

5. I've been playing the piano for 20+ years.

6. My favorite color is fuschia.

7. I grew up in a town with less than 500 people. I now live in a city with more than a million. 

Now I am to give this award to 7 people

1. Just a Girl at My Infertility Road

2. BrokenBirdsBees at The Broken Birds & Bees

3. Stinky at Beyond the Wallpaper

4. Lil Frenchie at An Empty French Womb

5. Lavonne at Our Wish

6. LisaSk at Wanted: One Good Embryo

7. BrownIris at The (In) fertility Diaries

Now for my IVF update. We are actually going to be starting...soon! I'll start bcp's while we are on our vacation. As long as AF comes on time then we're all set to start lupron within days of returning from our trip. So, crossing fingers that all goes well and tying up some last strings before taking off next week. 

A Little Progress

And may I say--it's very little. I headed off to the REs office for cd1 last week. They needed a pre-ivf ultrasound scan--which doesn't make much sense to me but whatever. While I was there we discussed getting me a calendar. The RE wanted me to start bcp now for a July cycle. I said no. I've read of people being over suppressed by being on bcp too long. So, we agreed I would start them with my June cycle. We then discussed timing. My only constraint has been that we start after July 1st because my health spending plan renews then. The office has known this for a couple months. Apparently they failed to tell me that the lab would be closed at the end of July/early August and that the RE would be on vacation the second week of August. So now due to my (funny, right?) time constraints it is looking unlikely that the ivf cycle will happen in July. They want to push it to August--which is horrible timing for me. I work in education so August is one of my busiest most stressful months at school. Sigh... So, September? They are still looking at my calendar and are supposed to get back to me sometime soon--hopefully before I leave for vacation. Meanwhile, the insurance issues still aren't worked out. No one is able to give me an accurate reflection of how much I will have to pay for this (including the insurance company). Insurance (while amazing) is just so frustrating. I have to call them back today to discuss.

Other than the above, I'm trying to plan for our vacation. It will be really great to get away for a few weeks. Of course, I always worry about our dogs--we have a housesitter coming to take care of them. But, this vacation is greatly needed. I've also been doing really well on my diet/exercise plan. The only positive to ivf getting pushed back is that I'll have more time to get in shape.